Surely the serpent will bite without enchantment; and a babbler is no better. ~ Ecclesiastes 10:11

I have been hugely concerned about revealing too much of myself on this blog for one of the reasons my ex cited grounds for breaking up with me is because I once posted on facebook:

I keep praying over and over again- Nevertheless Lord, let Thy Will and not my will be done…

I so desperately want Him to say “Yes my child, Yes, this is for you…” but I know that it needs to be what He wants for me, and not just what >>I want

 Sometimes… the hardest part is the waiting. 

His friends confronted him (without ever saying a word to me) about why was his girlfriend posting their relationship problems all over facebook? Clearly, that post MUST have been about the two of us (in their mind). He looked at me with pain in his eyes and said, “my own pastor’s wife said something to me about your post, you KNOW I hated having anything up on facebook, you KNEW that.” They didn’t consider it might be about picking which job location I wanted, where I might want to settle down permanently, or (since they barely knew me) if there was ANYTHING else going on in my life.  They just up and, instead of praying for someone who was clearly searching for God’s Will and confused, asked him why was his girlfriend posting about their relationship problems on facebook- specifically citing the above post.

I NEVER again want people to read what I write and end up seeing WHO is writing the post instead of THE ONE that the post is supposed to be about.  I naively posted that on my wall thinking that people would either encourage me or be inspired to also seek to do God’s Will above their own.  Instead, it was used to just tear me down and break up our relationship. The worst part was when he said “I didn’t even think anything about it when I first saw it but then everyone started saying things to me, even my pastor’s wife.”

The bible has some really strong words about what happens to those who gossip:

Whoever slanders his neighbor in secret, him will I put to silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, him will I not endure. ~ Psalm 101:5, NIV version

As my last post spoke about, I want all that I say and do to lift Him up.  To give God the glory.  Whether I live or die, whether I look prideful or ridiculous, if it gives God the glory, I don’t want to be silenced but to freely speak of His wonders.  Those people who talked about my post without ever speaking to me, God knows.  God knows and sees everything we do.  I now try to be much more careful about what I say because I never want to be one to inflict injury to others.  I pray that God is never made to silence me for slandering others in secret.

Jesus, 

Help us now be mindful of what we say and do.  Let us, instead of tearing others down, build YOU up. Let us forget the things of this world and just look unto You.  Let us be SO busy going about YOUR business that we don’t have the time to bother with hurting others around us.  Help us remember that the “you need to pray for Jane because of xyz” is NEVER a good excuse to spread gossip.  If we are truly concerned about someone, let us instead ask “Please pray for Jane. I just feel like she could use extra prayers right now.”  We need to lift each other up in prayer.  We need to seek to help those around us make it to the finish line in this race that You’ve set before us.  Jesus, help us strengthen each other without spreading gossip. I love You for protecting me from marrying a man that so easily allowed our relationship to be torn apart by gossip.  I thank You for helping me endure the destruction of those who were gossiping about me.  I love You Jesus with all my heart. 

Rebekah M.