And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. II Corinthians 12:9
Today in church the preacher taught on this subject. He spoke of how God is enough for all that we need. He didn’t promise Paul that he’d take away the “thorn in his side,” but He did promise that His grace was sufficient for him.
Lately, I’ve had this weird thing where I’ll just randomly have something spark a memory of my ex and before I can blink I’m whispering “I hate you.” I then have to check myself because I always quickly say “no, I gave it to God.” Today, while in church I asked Him what was going on. Why am I this way? He revealed to me that for months, I had been relying on God for EVERYTHING and thus, my weaknesses (such as the potential for anger, bitterness, and hatred) were covered by His strength. Through Him, I had the power to love (platonically in the way Jesus does) even the one who had hurt me so badly. More than any one else ever has.
Jesus opened my eyes and made me realize that without Him, my human emotions of anger and bitterness can arise again. Yes, He healed me. Yes, He patched me up. But I need time for everything to dry and set completely. I need to keep myself in the Potter’s Hands until the wheel is finished spinning or else I might end up shaped differently than He intended and He’ll have to rework me again.
Am I ready for a new relationship? I’m not sure yet. I really don’t know if I’m ready to call anyone a boyfriend. All I do know is that Jesus will work it all out. All I know is that Jesus is enough to help me through this human time of continuing to grow past the things behind me. Jesus is enough for me to start a new life…. in His timing.
I thank You that You are enough for everything. I thank You that You are sufficient to cover me in my humanness and allow me the freedom to give it all to You so that I might live an abundant life. I thank You that I can do all things through You. I thank You that when I am weak, You make me strong. I love You Jesus with all my heart.