Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee. ~ Song of Solomon 4:7
So often females feel inferior, ugly, fat, and stupid. When I was growing up, two of the boys from my church teased me relentlessly about my weight. It was to the point that I was once chased out of the church while they called me a whale. Was I overweight? Yes. But between their actions and my own family’s actions of trying to “encourage” me to lose weight only served to bury a deep seated fear that guys find me ugly and fat.
Shortly after my ex “accepted” that we were going to get married by freely telling me he had picked out a ring, he started in on my physical appearance. He sounded excited musing about the fact that I would, like all females getting married, want to lose as least ten pounds. He quickly went into how exactly I must go about this- demanding that I go to the gym 1hr, 3-5 days a week. As I argued with him telling him I hated the gym and even trying to compromise by promising to workout in my house that much, I began to feel more and more ugly. I wondered, how could this male tell me that he loved me and yet want to change how I look so much? Did he ever love me I mused. As things continued to deteriorate, it became clear that the answer to that question was “not the way I need and certainly not the way God does.”
I don’t want to be too harsh on my ex and say he never loved me at all.. just that it is NOTHING like this Jesus of mine. This God we serve and adore- He loves us beyond all things. He didn’t come and die for birds, He didn’t come and die even for the majestic deer; He came to die for sinners like you and me. I am SO beautiful in His eyes and He whispers it to my heart every day. I am fair. I am beautiful. I am a priceless treasure to the God of this universe. Dear reader- I hope you realize that you too are just as beautiful and priceless in His eyes!!!! True beauty comes from having a confidence in who you are in Christ. No man or woman can ever take you down when you realize this fact. After my ex dumped me and I emerged from weeks of fasting, guys started appearing in my life like crazy. For a while it seemed like I couldn’t even handle them all in my life. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think that I would be in a situation where so many guys IN CHURCH would be trying to talk to me. I realized it was because I now knew who I was in Christ and just how much He loved me. My closeness to Jesus drew people to me more than ever before because I confidently went about my life, knowing that I was loved so completely and deeply by the God of this universe.
I thank You that love me so much. I thank You that Your love frees me to do all the things that You have for my hands to do. I thank You that Your love frees me to live this life to the fullest. I thank You that no one will ever adore me as much as You do. I love and adore You Jesus with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength.