Now it came to pass, as they went, that he entered into a certain village: and a certain woman named Martha received him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus’ feet, and heard his word. But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her. ~Luke 10:38-42
We’ve had Prayer Monday for a while now and although there are times where we’ve had a great response to the really heartfelt prayers, I’ve started to feel like I also want to take the time to contemplate and dwell on the subject of prayer as well as hopefully get some of you to join in the discussion! This week I’ve felt like God was talking to me about how so often, I’m very busy with this or that. There’s church on Sunday, prayer Tuesday, midweek Wednesday, then with this blog there’s more work. Never mind that other thing I do called finishing medical school and preparing to hold the official title of doctor in just a few short months. There is always something to do, somewhere to be, and I know that it’s only going to become more busy when I start my intern year in July.
Although this is very much along the train of thought as last week, I truly feel like God is just trying to get hold of my heart and say “hello, child, just sit at my feet.” I spend time in prayer with my family every night, but do I pray on my own? Rarely. It’s an honest and yet humbling truth. God has given me so much but with everything packed in my life, after a long day at the hospital sometimes all I want to do is “veg out” to some hulu in the background and maybe a brainless game or texting for the short time I have left before bedtime. I could read His Word but instead I might read a recap of a show that I don’t have time to actually watch on hulu.
Why do I choose other things instead of God during my free time? Why is it that I seem so busy about so many other things and then when I do finally have free time, instead of spending it at the feet of my Lord, I just say “well, I will(or already) have(had) prayer time with my family over google hangout.” It’s like it’s a check list of things to do in my day. That’s not what God wants of me. It’s not what He asks. I know it must pain Him as much as it pained me when my ex #2 would act like it drained him to talk to me. I wondered why he was even with me if he seemed like he was “fulfilling his duty” to talk to me once a week on the phone.
Help me figure out what’s going on in my heart that makes me not joyfully come before You in my own time outside of my family prayer time. Help me understand what is going on that I can’t seem to find a balance between You and life. I do so much FOR You, but how much do I do WITH You? I know that my life isn’t completely devoid of seeking You and truly wanting You in my life, but I also know that it’s not the same as when I would escape back to the house just to have more time praying with You. You were all I wanted or needed for in You I found comfort and peace. Help me to stop being so busy about so many other things and just sit at Your feet. Help me to just bask in Your presence once again. Lord, help me be Mary the sister of Martha.
Dear readers, have you ever had a time like that yourself? How did you get out of it? Are you in it right now too? Let’s encourage each other in Christ!