So in my prayer time this morning, I felt God tell me I had to talk to the guy on the phone. I texted him and asked him to please call me and he did.
I told him that I had to disappear- in Christ- and urged him to do the same. Getting off facebook, twitter, instagram etc and not talking to single guys. Told him to do the same- bury himself in Christ and just…stop talking to all those single females, stop seeking anything other than Christ because what he needs no woman could ever give him. I can’t be what he needs because only GOD can give him what he needs- true healing from the scars of his divorce.
Do I believe this man can be transformed by God to become who I need? Yes.
The raw material of his good, sweet soul is amazing. He has such capacity to love and cherish and protect… but when his life shattered with his ex-wife’s actions and was accused of the opposite it… twisted him…. and he’s been trying to let God untwist him but it seems in the last month he’s been trying to take matters into his own hands and he’s twisted himself into someone I don’t even know. Someone who I cannot trust my heart with.
So I told him- if he wants to still meet in April (as we originally planned) to give me the respect to call me a week ahead of time to make plans… but in the mean time I’m concentrating on God to seek my healing from his actions (and yes, I purposefully used that phrasing because it WAS his actions that hurt me) and I implored him to do the same- seek God for his full healing so he could be the man that I need.
David had a choice after he sinned with Bathsheba and he chose repentance and doing what was right from then on. That baby of their sin died- just as our relationship died from his actions done in the shadows- but the next one was Solomon- the wisest man who ever lived. God can truly turn EVERYTHING around in the blink of an eye if we’ll just let Him! So I encouraged him to be like David- be the man after God’s own heart.
We’ll see what happens come April… but I know regardless… I am excited to see what God does in my life in the mean time 🙂
May you too find a place to just bury yourself in Christ right now. Find solace from the pains of this world. Let God buffer you if you’re in a time of pain. Let this time make you shine brightly for Him even if the process hurts. Let Him cover you with His love!