“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Jesus Christ our Lord.” ~Romans 8:38-39
“For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you “Do not fear; I will help you.” ~ Isaiah 41:13
I don’t have much for you guys today, just a quick story. The other day I was riding the subway home, as usual. I’ve been listening to preaching lately on the commute, because I find that when I’m home I get distracted and so the subway allows me some focused time with God. But not necessarily time to pray out loud, so preaching is a good alternative.
This particular day was similar, and I started a sermon. It didn’t resonate with me (this is unusual. I have been known to actually CRY on the subway because of sermons moving me. No I’m not kidding.). I switched to another one, trying to find the one that God had for me that day. In the end, I felt a pull to not listen to preaching, but to listen to worship instead.
I had to download some worship apps on my phone first, but I did and I started listening. Immediately I felt the quickening in my heart. This was right where God wanted me today. Standing with my eyes closed, not drawing in intellectually or learning anything, not even actively consciously listening (I don’t think I could recall a single lyric line now)….not DOING anything. Just being with Him and letting my soul soar to the sounds of praise.
Letting my soul soar.
And it was perfect. I felt that quickening of the spirit, and I let the music wash over me, and though my eyes were closed I saw before me a lion. The Prince of Peace Himself. It was as if the cry of my heart beckoned to Him and He came to receive and join in the song. It was the most “right” I’d felt in awhile.
How often do we let ourselves do that? To just be free in His presence? Free from the burden of needing something or giving something or doing something. Free from asking and appealing. Free from praying the “right” way. Free to be ourselves and let our souls express what’s truly inside.
Because what’s truly inside, my friends, is beautiful. I don’t care where you are in your walk. Maybe you’ve known Jesus for years. Maybe you’re just meeting Him today. Maybe you’ve been on a righteous path for a long time; maybe you’ve fallen away from one. Maybe you’ve yet to start one. Maybe you’re broken. Maybe you’re hurting. Maybe, just maybe, you aren’t even sure if it’s worth being here in this world anymore.
I’m here to tell you that it’s ok. It’s ok if you’ve known Him and want to sing with Him in harmony – He’ll join the refrain. It’s ok if your song is a cry of anguish – He’ll show you His peace. Behind every broken heart is a soul waiting to be restored to take flight. The point is, you’re heard. You’re known. You’re seen (even the ugly bits. He sees them. He always has. He sees the very depths of you, just like He saw it 2000 years ago and STILL – even with all the ugly – counted it worthy to die for). And you matter. Oh do you matter.
I guess my point here is, don’t hold back anymore. Draw in to Him today. Let your soul soar (or limp or even crawl, if that’s where you find yourself these days). Just don’t shut it down anymore. Don’t hide from Him. Let go of the stuff around you, shut your eyes, and let your YOU come out. Give it to Him. He is waiting to receive it. He’s waiting to hold you up. He’s waiting to walk with you, to run with you and to fly with you. There is no deed too dark for Him to see, no place where He can’t reach you.
You’re seen. You’re heard. You’re known.
And you, beloved….you matter.
God bless and know that I am praying for you.