Prayer Monday- Prayer of Peace

Jun10

So our loyal readers, you may have noticed that we have been dropping the ball here at Being Rebekah. We have a goal of posting daily and it’s pretty clear that last week, that didn’t happen. We usually try to fill in for each other when that happens but everyone has been a bit in over their head. In it all though, God has been SO amazing.

In follow up to my last post- Honor Thy Father: after his stone cold reception of my weeping apology, I tried to hold strong, believing that God saw and loved me and was proud of me. The next day, I see-sawed between despair and faith. I wanted to believe my dad would eventually come around, but it was breaking my heart that although EVERYONE was so proud of me, I felt as if my own father was disowning me and saying I was beyond hope. I remember sobbing in front of my computer, broken-hearted, and telling my friend it just hurt SO much.

The amazing part- God spoke to my dad. God was the one who truly heard all of our prayers (including you readers who prayed for him!!!) and brought peace to his heart. I was so proud and happy when he was asked to lead church prayer on Sunday and he was praising God for His peace. He confessed that he recently went through a time of just not wanting to talk to anyone; in a complete pit of despair that nothing would get better or change. But GOD. God came down and brought him peace and he was proclaiming to the congregation that God could do the same for them all. What a wonderful God we serve!!!

Readers- THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRAYERS!!! I know our hope here at BeingRebekah is to be a blessing to you all- but you all truly blessed my life by praying for my father.

One thing I will say that I learned in all this- when things were bad and even my mom was still pushing my past bad actions to the forefront despite my sincere repentance and promise to try to be better- I begged her to just stop everything with me and pray. GOD took over. He brought peace. He brought life and re-built bridges. He truly is the redeemer. He truly is our hope and savior.

SO much was dug up in my time of praying. So many things all the way back from my childhood were brought up, things I blamed my dad for (but didn’t realize until I prayed through it). Once I acknowledged them, forgave him for it, and let go- THEN that’s how I just haven’t yelled. The anger is gone. The quick temper with only my dad is gone. He has a personality where he wants peace so he’ll sometimes just not say anything, not even in defense of his children who are being put down by his own family. I had to forgive him and when that was let out and let go, I gained even more strength to live a life that honors God and my parents.

Readers, know that this God of peace, He can help you figure out what is the root behind your actions. Is there only one person in your life that you have an irrational anger with? Someone who has the lowest thresh-hold when it comes to getting you angry? Know that God can help you with that!! Just as I had things in my heart that I had to dig out and finally let go of, you may find that is the same for you. LET IT GO. I am free now. Free. These last few days have been more peaceful in my relationship with my dad than… I’m not even sure when. Praise God! I’m glad I can finally have a real relationship with my dad.

Thank You Jesus for truly being the Prince of Peace!

Rebekah M.

https://beingrebekah.com/2013/06/06/honor-thy-father/

Honor Thy Father

Jun6

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee. ~Ex 20:12

So I have a confession to make: in everything that has happened in my life I’m pretty successful on paper, but I have had one HUGE, MAJOR flaw. Don’t get me wrong, I love my dad, but I’ve treated him pretty horrible in the past. I just have this pre-set tendency to be angry and to yell at him. Do I have reasons for this- yes. I honestly feel like he doesn’t hear me. I’m not even talking physically, I mean I feel like he shuts me out when I’m speaking. So earlier this morning, my mom sat me down and we had a discussion about it. With tears in her eyes, she was pleading with me to treat my dad right. For anyone who knows me, they know that I love my parents SO much. I praise them often and, in my mind, I think respect them. God has used my mom (and kind of my brother) to open my eyes to the fact that I haven’t been. Of every one in my life, my mom is THE person to get through to me and for God to have her essentially crying before me… it ripped up my heart a little.

It is never right for a child to yell at her father. Even if she’s saying “Mashed potatoes. Hey dad, I want mashed potatoes. Just tell mom I want mashed potatoes! DAD, TWO WORDS- MASHED POTATOES YOU CAN SAY THAT TO HER! WHY WON’T YOU JUST LISTEN AND TELL HER THOSE TWO WORDS?! MASHED. POTATOES.” lol At the end of the day if I had just opened the car door and said it to my mom versus yelling at my dad (who was getting out of the car) to relay those words when all he kept saying in response was “tell your mother,” what’s the difference?

I realized the difference and why I didn’t just go the more peaceful route is because I just feel unheard. And in thinking about it, I realized that I HATE feeling like I’m not heard. For so long, a huge part of my life, I felt SO ignored and looked down upon. Not necessary by my parents, but I have had moments where I felt I had no voice and the memory of that feeling has never left me.

So as time has gone on and more and more incidents have occurred that left me feeling like I’m not heard (not always by my dad), it caused me to become quick to anger and yell at my dad. Was it right? NO. A big “N.” “O.” Am I justifying my actions? No because I have truly broken one of the 10 commandments. I have endeavored from this day forward to honor my father even when I feel like he doesn’t hear my words. However, I am saying that the biggest key in everything that happened today was to recognize within myself the “WHY” behind my actions.

I sat down with both my parents earlier today to talk things through and my dad actually literally did EXACTLY what I said was the reasoning behind why I acted the way I did- he shut me out. He literally would not hear my words. I was saying “I’m sorry for how I acted, it was unacceptable behavior and I’m sorry. I reflected and realized it was because for so long now, I have felt as if you don’t hear me and I’m sorry that my frustration about that has come out as yelling.” His response? To say that I’m moving in a few short days so it doesn’t really matter and all I was saying to him was that yet once again, it’s his fault- always his fault- none of mine. Miracle of miracles though- even though he was literally proving my point- I didn’t yell. I actually prayed. “God, give me wisdom to know how to reach my dad. Help me mend this bridge that I have broken with my anger and yelling. Forgive me and help me honor him.”

Sometimes we’re called to swallow our pride and just keep apologizing until the other person accepts it. If that never happens though- I know that today, I honored my father like I never have before and I know that God is smiling. So dear readers, pray for my dad? I know he loves me, but I also know that he has SUCH a weight on him from everything else going on and this only added to it. I allowed myself to be an instrument of further burden to my dad. My brother’s job has been in the balance lately, my “sister” has been in a spiritual battle, I’m moving away officially… there’s a lot weighing on his heart. He needs God’s peace. He needs God’s love to shine on him more than ever. So in advance, I thank you for your prayers for peace over my dad and I pray you all do a better job at honor your parents than I have done in my past 🙂

In Him and to a new future of truly honoring my parents,

Rebekah M.

Are You a Goat?

Jun5

And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats: And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left. […]Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal. ~Matt 25:32, 41-46

As I was driving earlier today with my God-sister, we started talking about how our church had such a tendency to focus on some really important truths, but one BIG lacking thing we noticed across the board was reaching out to the needy in our communities. It is SUCH an integral part of why I want to be a doctor- “I was sick and you visited me.” When I think of how so many churches don’t focus on that it breaks my heart. Where are the soup kitchens? Where are the can drives? Where are the coat drives? To have so many things right but not have any real community outreach just seems so wrong.

There are other churches with the flip side- they have tons of community outreach, but forget fundamentals of salvation or a true Christian walk. They’ll have soup kitchens galore, but people lack daily prayer lives. Anyone who needs an extra coat in winter will find one there, but saints don’t daily read their Bible. We can become so busy in doing things FOR Christ, we forget HIM.

We’ve got to find a balance. We cannot forsake the foundations of faith and once we have an established daily foundation for our faith we must extend and grow. So my question to all of you (and to myself) is on judgement day, will He find you a goat or a sheep?

Lord Jesus,

Help us be Your sheep. Help us walk where You lead us. Let us visit those who we should visit and minister unto others as if we are ministering unto You. May we look into their eyes and see Your reflection there realizing it is a mirror of ourselves when we are allowing YOU to work through us. Let me be Your hands and Your feet.

Rebekah M.

Jun1

Something interesting happened last night. At about 3am I woke up to a strange presence in the room. I knew instinctively it was there to cause harm and trouble. Honestly, I thought someone had broken into the room. When I realized there was nobody, but the presence still felt so tangible and so strong, my thoughts turned to the spiritual. I began to panic. And then I began to pray.

In the name of Jesus I commanded them out – whatever they were. I still don’t know. I told them that I stood on the rock of Jesus Christ and that they had no power here. At one point I even said “Satan you are not welcome here”. Beyond praying, the name “Rebekah” kept flashing in my head. Since that is the name of Scott’s fiance/wife (they had a marriage ceremony but never signed a license), and since God has already told me that she was coming from a place of pure evil, it almost seemed like whatever was in the room was coming from her. I don’t know why. I’m aware that doesn’t even make much sense, but there you go. Anyway, there was an audible woosh in the vicinity of the door, which I again thought was kind of weird, and then they were gone. It was as if it hadn’t ever happened, and I went back to sleep. The whole thing was a scene straight out of the book “He Came To Set the Captives Free“.

When I got up I found out that at 3am last night my friend Scott had been rushed back to the hospital due to problems with his ventilator. I don’t believe in coincidences – I believe God is too much in control and has things too well orchestrated for random coinciding events to happen. However, I have no idea what last night means.

I do know that for one last time, tomorrow, I am going to Scott’s house. I’ve already told my roommate that I plan to pray with him. Today I was there and there were people in and out all the time, and he talked to us a little but then his mother came in and pestered him about his legs showing and he shut down a bit (he was in a hospital gown with no covers on – he keeps a fan blowing on him and it makes him feel like he’s getting more air in his lungs). Tomorrow is my last chance to lay hands on him and pray, and I pray that God open the door.

In the meantime, I can feel myself getting bogged down in my personal emotions and heartbreak over the situation, and I pray strongly to abide in Jesus and have my heart fully open for His love, that it may radiate out of me. Love is what can move mountains, not my anger. So I pray for the grace to lay my anger and myself aside and love both Scott and Rebekah as Jesus calls me to. I know I’ve been asking it a lot, but I would appreciate your prayers over this too.

Thanks and God bless!

~Rebekah A

Surrounded by Love

May30

The Lord bless thee, and keep thee: The Lord make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: The Lord lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace. And they shall put my name upon the children of Israel; and I will bless them. ~Numbers 6:24-27

My time as a medical student is closing up. I am graduating this Sunday and the church out where I’m at this month is one that I was blessed enough to be at for 6 of the last 24 months. They have allowed me to sing a solo, a duet, and play the drums. I have been used to give messages, to increase faith, and see Him move in ways I never imagined. Last night at the end of service they gave me a graduation gift and had me speak. As I have reflected on it and my last few years, I can clearly see just how much God has loved me and seen me through SUCH painful times of my life. He has uplifted me when a guy who had promised a “forever” future with me shortly thereafter withdrew from me and broke my heart. He has picked the pieces up when friends have forsaken me. He has given me new hopes, new dreams, and new people to love me. I added the above scripture because I truly feel that from those who love me- they want God to shine upon my life. They want good things to happen to me. They want the road to meet me.

Thank You Jesus!

Thank You that my life is surrounded by love. As this chapter of my life closes up soon, let it be that YOU are all I need. May Your love continue to surround me as You allow others to come into my life to love me as well. Such blessings- amazing Godly parents, friends who would never leave me, and soon, on Sunday, I will be called doctor. WOW! Thank You Jesus!

I praise You God!

I thank YOU!

Thank You Jesus for surrounding my life in YOUR love!!!

With a grateful heart,

Rebekah M.

Peace in the Land

May28

“For they that be with us are more than they that be with them.” -2 Kings 6:16.

If you read my last post, This Too Shall Pass, you know that I’ve been struggling a bit recently. I have a ways to go, but God is fighting a mighty battle for me. Truly, the Lord is doing a wonderful work to restore peace in my life and give me new hope.

Last night I had a dream. In this dream a man began quoting Scripture to me. I did not immediately recognize it as something out of the Bible because the man was speaking in another language that I have pretty limited knowledge of. When I awoke, I used Google Translate to plug in the sounds I heard to try to get a frame of reference around the words I already knew. Working to put this puzzle together, it suddenly occurred to me that it sounded a bit like Scripture. So I pulled up biblegateway.com and began plugging in the words there. And I found it! I found what the man spoke to me in the dream!!

It was these verses from Leviticus 26:6-8:

“I will give peace in the land, and ye shall lie down, and none shall make you afraid: and I will rid evil beasts out of the land, neither shall the sword go through your land. And ye shall chase your enemies, and they shall fall before you by the sword. and five of you shall chase an hundred, and an hundred of you shall put ten thousand to flight: and your enemies shall fall before you by the sword.”

It’s amazing. I can’t even wrap my mind around the goodness of the Lord!! He gave me Scripture in a dream that speaks directly to my situation! I am personalizing and holding on to the promises in these verses:

I will have peace in the land.
I will lie down to sleep without fear.
God will rid the beasts out of my life.
I will chase the enemies (not the other way around).
The enemy will fall before me.
Five of us (my prayer & support team) will put a hundred to flight!

When I struggle this week I am going to remind myself of these Scriptures. I am going to remind the devil of them too. Rejoice with me. We serve a wonderful God!

In His Love,

Rebekah L.

Prayer Monday: Purge Me

May27

I haven’t been doing so well lately. Something in me is restless. I found myself easily angered by stupid things. I found myself frustrated beyond belief unnecessarily. I found myself recently failing a trial. Today while driving home, I just poured my heart out. Sobbing to the One who can comfort me, I told Him just how much I was sorry for failing once again. I told Him how much I just wanted to be free of the things that seem to trip me up. I was torn up and broken before Him. In that time though, of truly allowing my heart to be open before Him, I found Him just going in and dumping out all the muck. He dug in, taking out the things that I have no power to take out on my own. As He did His work, I felt His incredible sorrow that I wrote about ME feeling for a friend of mine (in the post God’s Sorrow)… but His sorrow was just as deep and directed AT ME. Then… as I poured more of myself out, I felt Him opening up my heart and letting His light shine. To bring back life and hope. So that I could feel His forgiveness. To see His divine purpose. To realize that He had more things to burn away from my soul, but that everything is allowed in an effort so that I can be His light. So that I will be ready for the ministry He has in store for me.

So reader, if you feel led to, join me in this prayer:

Jesus,

I’m desperate for You. I’m longing for You. Come like a flood, purge me of myself, and saturate me now with You. You’re all I want. Clean out everything within me, burn out the bad in me, and make me whole and new in You. As my dad once prayed for me, give me a new bottle… all the different kinds of bottles that hold all the different kinds of promises- of family, of jobs, of friends, of ministry… give us all new bottles- ones filled with hope and YOUR blessings. Things that seem dead and stale in our lives and hearts, purge them, and replace them with YOU. Be everything in our lives. Fill every last crevice that was cleaned out as You purged us. Fill it with Your love, Your purpose, Your plan. Use us to share Your good news! You are alive! You want to give us good lives! Praise You Jesus! Praise You God!

Rebekah M.

P.S. Below I’ve put a video up of a song I recently put on facebook. This song is still resonating in my heart today, even stronger actually.

Prayer Monday: He is Faithful

May20

This weekend, I have learned yet once again that He is faithful. Let’s all pray this “praise prayer” together (even if you use your own words 😉 ).

Jesus,

I praise You for being faithful. I worship You that in all times, You are good! Thank You Jesus for turning tides. Thank You Jesus for being my constant, wonderful companion who knows best. Thank You that all things are safe in Your hands! There is none like You! There is no greater love, no greater power, and no greater friend than You!!! Thank You for dying for me. Thank You for rising again in power. Thank You for sending Your wonderful gift of living in our hearts as the Holy Ghost!! You are the Lord, the famous one, great is Your name in all the earth!!!

With a grateful heart,

Rebekah M.

Song of the Day: Show Jesus by Jamie Grace

May10

Last night I had an interesting conversation with a recent acquaintance of mine. He wanted to know my thoughts on homosexuality. It was pretty clear he went in with the idea that if I said it was wrong that he would never speak to me again. I prayed for wisdom on what words to say- not because I so deeply cared if he left my life (he really isn’t any part of my life)- but because all times can be a moment to bring people closer to understanding principles of God. I honestly don’t want to delve into my stance because this topic is controversial and I like keeping my posts about my personal main focus in life: showing God’s love.

I wrote a bit about this before in my post “The God of Love”. I think the amazing part of everything is that by the end of the conversation I stood by the Bible but I also opened his eyes to the fact that just because one may not agree with someone else, it doesn’t mean they have to hate them nor shun them. This Jesus, He is all about bringing people together and having peace be in the midst. We don’t have to fight or hurt others. Just show them Jesus. Show them love and God will do the rest and reveal as He wills. Let your light be so bright- the light of His love- that it’s evident who you are for.

In love,

Rebekah M.

https://beingrebekah.com/2013/03/31/the-god-of-love/

Fostering the Family

May9

I was listening to this the other day. I’m not even sure what to call it. It’s not a song, and not a sermon. Just a video, a call to family. It’s not a call to the immediate family, or even to blood relatives, but a call to the Christian family. Because we do, after all, share the same Father.

Which got me thinking. If we share the same Father, we are all family. Do we act that way? Do we treat every lost person we see as family? Unconditionally loved, happy to see them? In our hearts, do we recognize them as brother and sister?

I know I don’t. I try to. But all too often, going through my day, I treat people like strangers. Because really, they are. It’s both strange and eye-opening to walk through crowded streets of Manhattan, not knowing a soul but knowing that I’m walking through family and potential family. Because that’s what it is for those who are lost – a potential family. A family that is just waiting for them to join it. To come back to it. To come into their identity that Christ gave them, to live the way they were created to. To come into their inheritance as sons and daughters.

But what am I actively doing to welcome them in? To claim them as brother and sister and show them what this family looks like? God gives me discernment over people sometimes, and it guides my prayer. Other times He gives me a word for people and I do my best to be bold enough to speak it. But if it’s not a direct order, I usually leave them alone. And I don’t think that’s really enough. Yes it’s the crowded streets of Manhattan. But a smile, a greeting, a compliment…those things cost nothing. It doesn’t always have to be profound. Every moment is a chance to show our Father’s love.

Yes, some families here on earth are dysfunctional. Some family members don’t treat each other all that great. But not ours. Not with the Dad we have. So we shouldn’t act like it.

I posted the video below, just because it sparked all my rambling. And I leave you with a call of your own, as you go through your day. It’s a call to not just be outwardly nice to people because we know we should, but to see every person you come across through the eyes of the Father, and see them as a potential brother or sister. What family members have been right in front of you have been right in front of you this whole time?