For the past two years I have been dealing with blatant sexual harassment from a co-worker. It started when this man asked me out on a date. He was a pastor of a denomination similar to mine and had always been very friendly with me. Although not well known by the English speakers in my company, he was highly respected among the Hispanic employees (He is Latin American) and I was intrigued by him. I agreed to the date.
We had a nice time and I readily agreed to a second date. I began to wonder if it might be God’s plan for us to partner together for the work of the Kingdom. I wanted him to be the one, but I couldn’t shake this feeling in the pit of my stomach that something just wasn’t right. It was after the fourth date that I found out that he is married! He never wore a ring and had never mentioned a wife so I really had no idea. This was not even a case of him being separated, he is a fully married man! Obviously, that was the end for me.
But it was not the end. Not for him. Not by a long shot.
He refused to accept that I was no longer interested in him. He refused to back down. He would not leave me alone. He would beg me to give him a chance. He would come to my office and tell me the explicit things he fantasized about doing with me. He would tell me that I was in his heart and mind. He would plead with me to have sex with him “just one time. Just one time, por favor.”
Suddenly the man who had always seemed so friendly became aggressive and frightening. It didn’t matter how many times I said no, he wouldn’t stop. He began purposely trying to intimidate me. He would block my exit from my office. He would follow me into the women’s restroom. He would be waiting at my car when I tried to leave for the day. If I wrote all of the things he said and did over the last two years, you would be amazed (and perhaps judgmental) about the fact that I did not do more to stop it. For a while I was paralyzed by it. It was scary to me. I didn’t know how to handle it.
I determined in my heart that I didn’t want to be the reason that this man lost his job. He has a family to support. I kept praying that God would have mercy on him and grant him a heart of repentance. I prayed that he would get a revelation of God that would change his behavior. When things didn’t seem to change I began to pray that God would get this man away from me. I didn’t really care how it happened; I just wanted it to happen. I prayed he would repent and leave me alone. When it seemed he wasn’t going to do that I prayed he would transfer to another location in our company. When that didn’t happen I prayed he would find another job or quit. I just kept praying for God to get him away from me.
It took a while, but eventually I began to see things differently. God helped me to fight the battle spiritually. He helped me to recognize that this man is under the influence of Satan and he needs deliverance. He never changed his behavior, but the effect it had on me changed. I stopped being afraid. I stopped letting it linger in my mind. I just kept giving it to God. Somewhere along the way, the peace of God began to replace the negative thoughts and feelings I had. I began to focus all my prayers on his soul. He is a man who is spiritually in a very dangerous place.
Yesterday I got notice that this man is being laid off. Finally, he will be away from me. I pray that he is able to find another job quickly, but I would be lying if I didn’t tell you that I feel relief. I find it interesting that it wasn’t until I found peace in the situation that the answer to my prayer came. I’m not saying that he is being laid off because of my prayers, but it is an answer to my prayer. I could have had him fired a long time ago, but I didn’t want to be personally responsible for him losing his income.
I have mixed feelings about this. I rejoice in my deliverance, but I grieve for his continued bondage. I pray that he does not become a problem for someone else. May God have mercy on his soul.
Have you ever experienced something like this in your walk with God?
In His Love,
Rebekah L.
So after a few days post-cleansing by God on Sunday, I realized that the freedom I feel goes beyond just forgiveness. It took me until today to really grasp the concept that I was spiritually oppressed. Now I don’t like to give the devil and his minions more credit than they are due, but this freedom is really huge. I went from feeling plagued by a constant feeling of “I never want to be with a guy like that EVER again” and “I loved him” (as if holding on to the fact that I had once loved someone meant something) to just a whole lifting of my soul. God brought it to my mind that during my prayer on Sunday, I prayed against spirits who were reminding me of my past to leave me and never come back. It was in the moment but the more time goes on I realize it was totally Jesus’ leading.
If you are daily plagued by thoughts multiple times a day either of your past or any other thing that is not of God, know that this struggle might be beyond just you being weak! It took God sending me literally to the other side of America to visit family where very specific preachers would be preaching that Sunday for it to come to surface enough to be banished from my life. I didn’t even recognize things for what they were! I thought I was weak and it was just my self who was creating this spiritual spiral of “stinkin’ thinkin’ ” but God has bringing to light that it was more than just me! Yes, my weakness created a stronghold, but as time continued and I didn’t address things right then and there, the enemy created a place for itself in my life to remind me over and over again of things just for my bitterness and anger to continue.
Being Rebekah 