Tag Archive | Christianity

Faith is not a Feeling

Our Mission Statement here at Being Rebekah declares that we are “real girls living real lives.” It also says that we hope that our readers will be inspired to passionately follow Christ. Lately, I feel that my “real life” could only inspire in the sense of giving the readers a guide on exactly what not to do in their walk with Christ. That being said, our blog truly does strive to show both the mountain peaks and the valleys.

I’ve been so up and down lately. I feel beaten down by Satan one minute and the incredible exhilaration of the Lord’s rescue the next. God keeps showing up in amazing ways. Unfortunately so does the enemy. Knowing the Lord is there should be enough to keep the enemy’s tactics from bothering me, but I’ve been on the edge of despair more times than I care to admit in the last few weeks.

I have wonderful people praying for me and I’m wearing them out. What’s the point of having them pray for me if I never seem to improve – or if improvement is only temporary? I’m holding the key. No amount of prayer on their part will make up for a lack of will on mine.

So what if I’m down, does that make the Lord any less powerful? Does it make His Word any less true? Does it make the devil’s future any less sure? No. No. No. I refuse to give in to my feelings. I refuse to listen to the voice of the enemy.

The following two things are true:

Faith is not dependent on feelings.
The devil is a liar.

Satan likes to manipulate our emotions to our spiritual detriment. Elijah felt like giving up right after a huge spiritual victory. Saul felt very spiritual right after he disobeyed God. Feelings are not a good thermometer for our spiritual condition. Being a Christian is a walk of humble faith, love, and obedience; it is not based on emotions.

I need to continue to do what I know to do regardless of what I’m feeling. Faith is action. Faith is obedience to the Word of God. Faith is not a feeling! Period.

Peace in the Land

May28

“For they that be with us are more than they that be with them.” -2 Kings 6:16.

If you read my last post, This Too Shall Pass, you know that I’ve been struggling a bit recently. I have a ways to go, but God is fighting a mighty battle for me. Truly, the Lord is doing a wonderful work to restore peace in my life and give me new hope.

Last night I had a dream. In this dream a man began quoting Scripture to me. I did not immediately recognize it as something out of the Bible because the man was speaking in another language that I have pretty limited knowledge of. When I awoke, I used Google Translate to plug in the sounds I heard to try to get a frame of reference around the words I already knew. Working to put this puzzle together, it suddenly occurred to me that it sounded a bit like Scripture. So I pulled up biblegateway.com and began plugging in the words there. And I found it! I found what the man spoke to me in the dream!!

It was these verses from Leviticus 26:6-8:

“I will give peace in the land, and ye shall lie down, and none shall make you afraid: and I will rid evil beasts out of the land, neither shall the sword go through your land. And ye shall chase your enemies, and they shall fall before you by the sword. and five of you shall chase an hundred, and an hundred of you shall put ten thousand to flight: and your enemies shall fall before you by the sword.”

It’s amazing. I can’t even wrap my mind around the goodness of the Lord!! He gave me Scripture in a dream that speaks directly to my situation! I am personalizing and holding on to the promises in these verses:

I will have peace in the land.
I will lie down to sleep without fear.
God will rid the beasts out of my life.
I will chase the enemies (not the other way around).
The enemy will fall before me.
Five of us (my prayer & support team) will put a hundred to flight!

When I struggle this week I am going to remind myself of these Scriptures. I am going to remind the devil of them too. Rejoice with me. We serve a wonderful God!

In His Love,

Rebekah L.

Make Me an Instrument of Your Peace

May14

Words are timeless. The Scriptures are the purest example of this, but sometimes even mere mortals manage to write down a few thoughts that last centuries. The poem below was written about 800 years ago. You’ve probably heard it before, but it’s a good reminder of what we should strive for as Christians.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon:
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope
where there is darkness, light
where there is sadness, joy.

O divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

~A Prayer of St Francis of Assisi

Jesus, I am so much more inwardly focused than I should be. Lord, “grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand, to be loved as to love.”

In His Love,

Rebekah L.

Restoration (Part III)

Apr30

“So David recovered all that the Amalekites had carried away, and David rescued his two wives. And nothing of theirs was lacking, either small or great, sons or daughters, spoil or anything which they had taken from them; David recovered all” (1 Samuel 30: 1-8, 18-19).

Four years ago I went through a very trying time in my faith. My spiritual family and I were hurt very deeply during this time. My godparents were falsely accused of many terrible things. Through much prayer, I eventually made the decision to leave that church and within a few days my god-parents were asked to leave as well. By the end of that year I had lost several close friends.

One of these was a dear friend to me that I had defended repeatedly in her time of trouble. Yet when my time of trouble came, she turned her back on me. She sent me disparaging emails, unfriended me on facebook, and disconnected from me socially and spiritually. I was heart-broken.

^“Even my close friend, someone I trusted, one who shared my bread, has turned against me” (Psalm 41:9).

All communication between us stopped – with one exception. Every year on her birthday I sent her a one line email wishing her a good year and a happy birthday. Occasionally, I also tried to encourage her in other more subtle ways; for example, leaving uplifting comments on a mutual friend’s post in reply to one of her comments. We were no longer “friends”, but by way of mutual contacts I knew that she could see some of those things. For the most part, my efforts were ignored.

I admit it was difficult for me. I was hurt that she rejected me. I was angry that she was judging me without knowing or understanding what had really happened at the church. I was sad that we were no longer friends. I missed her.

It took me some time, but eventually I forgave her. She was doing what she felt she had to. In shunning me, she was following the direction of her leadership. I understood that to go against the church leadership is rebellion; she was trying to do the right thing. Yes, I had defended her vehemently to that same leadership when they were falsely accusing her of things, but she never knew that. Yes, she believed the false reports spoken about us, but they were constructed in such a way as to be very convincing. In the end I felt badly for her that she was still in that situation when I had found my way to freedom.

Indeed, while that was the most difficult time I have had to endure since becoming a Christian, it was also the catalyst for helping me to grow in Christ and to dig deeper into Him. I have been incredibly blessed in this last four years. I now attend a wonderfully loving church with very supportive leadership. I have been able to attend Bible College, coach the youth in Bible Quizzing, be involved in a Chinese Home Church and meet many wonderful new friends. Everything that I lost was restored to me and then some! Is the church I attend now a perfect church? No, of course not. But it is exactly what I need in my life and it has afforded me many opportunities that would have been closed to me at my old church.

“For I will restore health to you, and heal you of your wounds, says the Lord, because they called you an outcast saying: This is Zion; No one seeks her.” (Jeremiah 30:17).

I have learned that truly all things work together for good (Romans 8:28) and that going through that time helped to bring me to where I am now. I also have a greater love and appreciation for those around me because I understand that things can change at any time and I know what a blessing it is to have them in my life.

Today, my dear friend that I lost four years ago sent me a friend request on Facebook. This may seem like a small thing, but I assure you, this is no small thing! Tears instantly welled behind my eyes when I saw it. Perhaps we will never be able to recover a friendship like the one we used to have, but I gladly welcome her back into my life. I pray she is well and that God is blessing her.

We truly serve a God of restoration!

In His Love,
Rebekah L.

Reaching People with Love

Apr4

Last week I wrote about Praying with a Muslim co-worker. Surprisingly of the two posts I have written on this topic, only one commenter has said anything negative. I actually expected it to be much more controversial than it has proven to be. I made a decision to respond to the negative comment privately (instead of on our site) after I visited his blog and discovered that he loves to have long, drawn-out, and very viscous public arguments. Indeed even our private conversation became a painful attack very quickly. I’m not afraid of controversy, but I like to limit negativity. There is a difference. The thing is, I love my Muslim co-worker. I do not agree with her religion, but I love her. For that reason I feel protective of her and don’t want her or others like her to be subjected to the kinds of hateful things he was writing in his emails to me. Everyone has the right to free speech – on their own blog. On my posts, however, I choose not to subject myself or our readers to hateful speech. It’s the same as how in your house you are free to watch any kind of television program you wish to, but in my own house I choose not to subject myself to ungodly programming.

I will say though that this person brought up some points that made me realize some people may misunderstand the nature of my interactions with my Muslim co-worker. I considered posting his entire initial comment here so that I could go through it point by point, but it would make for a very long post and I want the focus of this post to be love. But I’ve decided in the future that I may allow the initial negative comment to be posted, along with my response, but then limit subsequent dialog if it starts spiraling down the rabbit hole. Those are just my own thoughts, the other Rebekahs may handle comments on their posts differently.

Here’s the thing, people are won to the Lord by love. They are not won through clever arguments, coercion, or Bible thumping. They are certainly not won through curses, threats, or hate. Rebekah M. recently wrote about this in her post: The God of Love. You see, it was the LOVE of God that compelled Him to die on a cross for me. When the Lord talked with the Samaritan woman at the well He did not attack her with ugly words. He did not ignore her (which was customary in His day). He did not condemn her. The Samaritan woman had at least three things going against her: first, she was a woman. Generally men wouldn’t speak to women who weren’t in the presence of a male relative. Second, she was a Samaritan. Samaritans were considered to be lower than dogs to the Jewish people. Their worship was tainted with pagan rituals and beliefs. Third, she was a woman of ill-repute. She lived a very ungodly lifestyle. None of this stopped Jesus from reaching out to her. He had compassion on her. His compassion didn’t mean that He condoned her activity, no, He was honest with her and told her she needed the living water that only He could offer. He treated her with love.

Likewise, I am doing my best to love the people around me with a godly love. My Muslim co-worker knows I don’t agree with her religion. We have had many conversations about who Jesus is and what He did. I am praying that one day she will get the revelation that what I’m telling her isn’t just what I believe, it is TRUTH.

I can completely understand people being uncomfortable with what I’m doing with my Muslim co-worker, especially as it relates to our mutual prayers. I myself have gone into this with much caution and prayers. I have saturated it in prayers. My personal prayers every single day are for God’s will in this situation. We have also prayed about this many times in our family prayers. People at church have prayed. I have asked God to close the door if He isn’t in it. But the door has remained open and I have seen how He is drawing her through this. She’s asking many more questions about Jesus now. Our conversations are focused on God. She wants to know more about what I believe. She wants to know more about Him. She doesn’t yet realize that what is holding her back from knowing Him is the weight of tradition and the comfort of ritual. She doesn’t yet realize that it is her fear of familial and cultural expectations that are blinding her, but I believe in a God who knows how to take off the blinders!

One thing this commenter wrote to me was how Muslims pray towards Mecca and that by doing that with her I’m praying toward an idol. Actually, he’s made an assumption (which I can understand because my post wasn’t very clear) that isn’t true. I pray next to her, but we don’t face the same direction. I actually do that on purpose. She prays on the floor on her prayer mat while I pray seated at my desk which faces a different direction. As I mentioned in my first post on this topic, it is much more like we are praying at the same time, rather than praying together. The thing is, she is going to pray regardless, with or without me being present. Because my office is one of the few places she can do this, I’m almost always going to be there. I can choose to sit silently while she praises Allah, or I can choose to lift of the name of Jesus. If I’m there praying in the Name of Jesus, there is a chance she will feel His Spirit move in a way she hasn’t felt before. There is a chance she will feel HIM reaching out to her. There is a chance my prayers will awaken something in her that will lead her to Truth. It is very clear to both of us that the focus of our prayers is different. She knows I’m praying to Jesus and that I believe He is the only way.

Condemning her won’t win her to the Truth, only love can do that. I remember very clearly sitting in a church service where the preacher was talking about something controversial. He got the whole congregation laughing and poking fun of people. What he didn’t know is that I came out of the lifestyle he was making fun of. When the congregation started laughing, it felt extremely personal, like they were all laughing at me. Even though none of them knew about my past, it was a humiliating experience for me. I didn’t feel love, I felt contempt. If the Lord had not already converted me, I’m sure I never would have stepped foot in a church again.

We need to be sensitive and compassionate if we want to win people to the Lord. Yes, it’s VERY important that we don’t participate in ungodly activities, but the best way to separate someone from their ungodly ways, is to show them the love of Jesus. Jesus won me with love, and I have faith that He will win my Muslim co-worker with love as well.

In His Love,

Rebekah L

Confident in His Love

Mar19

A few weeks ago one of the other Rebekahs wrote A Daddy’s Chastisement about how she was messing up and what the Lord did to pull her out of that situation. His chastisement, while difficult at the time, turned out to be exactly what she needed in order to fully restore a right relationship with Him. In the end that chastisement catapulted her into a great blessing.

This weekend I found myself in a similar situation where I was doing something totally out of God’s will and while I was doing wrong of my own choice, God still swept in to rescue me before I made a bad situation worse. With the help of some God-timed technological quirks, through my god-sister and godparents I was given my “way of escape” (1 Corinthians 10:13) to get out of the situation I was in. Like Rebekah M. felt when her parents found out what was going on with her, I was also mortified to have my godparents find out about the circumstance I had gotten myself into, but experiencing their love and acceptance at a time like that has shown me something I would not have seen otherwise.

My god-sister is in one state, my godparents live in a second state and I live in a third state. None of that stopped them from coming together to help me. Recently I confessed in my Rooted and Grounded post that I have difficulty believing that anyone could actually care for me and I struggle to trust God and accept His love. God used the situation this past weekend to show me that even when I’m messing up, even when I sin, even when I’m outside of His will, I am never outside of His love.

Would you believe my god-parents got up in the middle of the night and drove all the way to where I was in order to bring me to the safety of their home? Would you believe that my god-sister stayed on the phone with me until after two o’clock in the morning? She didn’t let me go until she knew her parents had arrived and I was safe in their care. When I checked my cell phone history to see how many phone calls they all made to try to reach me there were 36 (most of them went unanswered). Between my godparents and my god-sister there were 36 different attempts to contact me! The devil has lied to me; he tells me no one loves me, but people who don’t care just don’t do that. Someone acting out of an intent other than love might make one or two token attempts at contacting me, but only genuine care and concern can motivate someone to make dozens of phone calls in the wee hours of the morning.

Do you believe that God uses people to show His love for us?

Back at my godparents house they didn’t show any anger for dragging them out of bed in the middle of the night and they didn’t show judgment for the predicament I found myself in. They wrapped me in their love. My mind is completely blown thinking about it. They had every reason to treat me poorly, but they treated me with the love and mercy of the Lord.

My godfather wrote the following in an email to me today: “Amen to what you said about confidence in the love of God individually. We all should remind ourselves from time to time that Jesus died for MY sins and rose for MY living. He is always close to ME and He cares about ME, always. And it is not because I’m big headed (someone special), but just because HE is (His nature)!

Where I expected to feel the crush of condemnation, I instead felt the embrace of Jesus’ love. It amazes me how merciful our God is. He is constantly reaching out to us, seeking to restore us to a right relationship with Him. Over and over, I fail Him, and yet His mercy endures. His love offers us another chance. The Lord used the people in my life to show me that I am loved. Truly, despite all my fears and failures, God loves me.

Dear Reader,

If you’ve messed up, don’t give up! If you repent, God is faithful to forgive you! He loves you more than you know. He is reaching out to you, just as He reached out to me; in love. He was willing to suffer the cross for you, and He wants you to have confidence in His love for you as an individual. He doesn’t just love us collectively as part of humanity; He loves us individually – where we are right now, flaws and all. He is a wonderful, merciful, amazing God!

In His Love,

Rebekah L.

Disquieted

Mar12

“Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.” –Psalm 42:11

I’m struggling today. I’ve been dealing with a certain situation for a year now. I’ve prayed and prayed and prayed for it to be resolved, but it continues. Clearly there must be some lesson here that the Lord is trying to teach me. Clearly I’m failing the lesson. But I will praise Him anyhow. I praise my God and my King for keeping me even when I’m tired and frustrated. Thank you, Jesus.

-Rebekah L

Identity in Christ

Mar5

Definition of Identity:

1) The fact of being who or what a person or thing is.

2) A close similarity or affinity.

I have spent the last few years on a journey of discovering who I am. It started with uncovering a family secret in 2009 that the man who raised me may not actually be my biological father. Worse than this discovery was finding out that the man suspected of being my father was the person in my life who had wounded me more deeply than any other human being on this earth. Emotionally this put me in a tailspin. As a result I started down a path to try to gain a sense of identity. In the last few months I have done extensive research on my family tree and a few days ago received the results of a DNA test to help answer some of these questions. The outcome of this test gave me more questions than answers.

The results of this test were not exactly what I wanted. In talking about it with my godfather he said that sometimes it’s better not to know. He is right, but it’s in our human nature to want to understand where we come from and why things happened the way they did. But I thank God that He has given me peace in this situation. The Lord has held me through every fear and comforted me through my tears. He is my true Father!

I Praise the Lord for His revelation to me that my identity does not lie in bloodlines and broken promises, my identity rests in Jesus Christ! 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” Where I come from is not important, it’s where I am going!

“But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on His name: Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God” (John 1:12-13).

When we are baptized in Jesus Name, we take on His name! We enter into a relationship with Him and from then on we get to use the family name. What a privilege it is to be able to call ourselves Christians! He is our perfect father. He takes care of us, provides our needs, He helps us to grow and even disciplines as we need it because of His enduring love. When we receive His spirit we are freed from the bondage of the enemy and we receive the “spirit of adoption whereby we cry Abba, Father” (Romans 8:15).

“Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God” (John 1:12).

I want to be so wrapped up in God that it is obvious to everyone that I meet that I belong to Him! I want people to know that I am His child. I want my identity to rest firmly in Him! I want to encourage all of our readers to embrace your Christian identity. There is nothing greater than the salvation He offers us, but beyond that we have received something so special from God; we have received the right to call him Daddy!

In His Love,

Rebekah L.

Rooted and Grounded in Love

Feb27

“Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to fully understand. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” –Ephesians 3:17-19

This verse is one of many in the Bible that speaks of God’s incomprehensible love for us. I don’t think we can ever truly grasp that love. It is the love of one who laid down His life on the cross for the sins of all people. He laid down His life for me. Unworthy, undeserving me. And He laid down His life for you.

I have struggled all my life to believe that someone could actually love me. Me of all people, but this verse clearly says that God loves me and that I should strive to understand just how wide and deep that love is. It also says that as I trust in Him, my roots should grow down into that love. Being rooted and grounded in love should give us such a confidence in God that nothing can penetrate it. The Bible says that perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18). As we allow these roots to grow in His love, it keeps us strong!

A few years ago sitting in a meeting with my former pastor and his wife, a finger was pointed at me and I was told matter-of-factly, “No one will ever love you.” I have mentioned this incident once before on this blog and to a few select people in my life. I’ve yet to completely free myself from these words because they were the vocalization of something I already believed about myself.

But recently in prayer God gave me a revelation: the Bible says in the mouth of two or three witnesses let every word be established (2 Corinthians 13:1). This word that no one will ever love me has never been corroborated. There has never been another witness to tell me this. In fact, of the few people that know about this incident, the reaction has almost universally been horror that someone would say this to me and everyone I’ve told has disagreed with it. More importantly, the Word of God establishes over and over again that I am loved. He loves me. If no one else on this earth ever has affection for me it does not matter because the God who created the universe, the Savior of the world, the Redeemer of my soul loves me!

Why then do I struggle to accept this love? I believe the Word of God. I know His Word is true. I know that it was the love of God that saved me. He loved me enough to pluck me out of the miry clay. He has blessed me beyond anything I deserve or could ask for. But part of me still believes I am fundamentally unlovable. This mind-set is keeping me from experiencing the love of God as it truly is and it is hindering my walk with Him. I think the solution to this problem lies in the verse I posted above from Ephesians 3. Lord help me to trust completely in You! I need to be rooted and grounded in the love of Christ! I need a revelation of how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is.

If I cannot accept the love of Jesus, how can I ever hope to accept the love of a fallible human being? There are people in my life who tell me they love me, but I have trouble believing them. I know they mean it when they say it, but I don’t know if their love is real so I test it over and over again. Often the result of this testing is to push them further away from me. I do this with God too. His love can withstand the testing, but can it withstand my lack of trust? God’s love is perfect and I need to be perfected in it. I’m not there yet. But I know that God is working on me. He is helping me. This revelation about getting two or three witness is huge. Now whenever that nasty memory comes to mind, I can counteract it with the truth of the Word. My strength lies in Him! When the enemy tries to tell me I cannot be loved, I will say “It is written”.

Have you ever struggled to believe something in the Word?

In His Love,

Rebekah L.

Being Christian – Loving God, Loving People

Feb19

I have a bit of a confession to make: I have no idea how to be a Christian. I mean, it seems simple enough; believe Jesus. But that’s really just the beginning. That’s what it takes to wear the label, but how we actually live out our Christianity from day to day isn’t so easy.

The Bible is full of wisdom and instruction on the subject and though I’ve committed to live by its principles I still find myself floundering at times. I wonder if I’ll ever get it right. And therein lies the problem. I’m entirely too self-focused. It’s not about me perfecting the rules and regulations, it’s about letting God transform me from the inside out. It’s really His work. I just have to be willing to lay my old man down and allow Him to create me anew.

When it comes down to it, being a Christian is really about loving God and loving people. It’s not about looking inward; it’s looking up to God and out to the people. We’re servants. We’re here to serve God and to honor God by serving others.

Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. –Matthew 22:37-39

When we really love God we are willing to decrease so that He can increase (John 3:30). We will strive to do what He asks of us (John 14:15). When we really love God we will love people (John 13:35). When we really love people, we will have a burden to reach them for the Lord! This is true Christianity.

Lord, help me to love you better. Help me to love your people better. Help me to believe you for every area of my Christian walk. Teach me how to follow after you with everything I have. Guide me on the path and show me how to be a true Christian. I struggle with how to best to represent you. I don’t know how to do the things I know I should do, but you are a merciful patient teacher, and I thank you for that. Thank you for your unending love.

In His Love,

Rebekah L.